Aquarius - December 2012 - Funny Horoscope

Flying through the air, maybe behind a few reindeer, on a magic carpet, or even in a Boeing 767, are equally well starred this month, but not when the wind is over 5 mph.

House chores while under the influence of either alcohol or prescription drugs, is poorly starred again this month, especially when trying to open jars.

Opening A Jar Tip Of The Month From The Planets When Under The Influence Of Either Alcohol Or Prescription Drugs: Don't try that fast twisting motion, as if you are trying to surprise the jar with your quickness: hold the jar cap in one hand and the jar in the other for about ten seconds until the jar top gently warms then say something like "Here we go", "Here you are" or "Unckt!" and push down and then round firmly until it opens. This might take anything up to 2 hours to complete.

Greet friends Euro style all month with at least three kisses on their alternate face cheek.

 

This feature is brought to you by theVoiceofReason.com

© theVoiceofReason.com 2000 onwards
 
Other Horoscopes for this month
Mar 20 - Apr 19
Apr 20 - May 19
May 20 - Jun 20
Jun 21 - Jul 21
Jul 22 - Aug 22
Aug 23 - Sept 21
Sept 22 - Oct 22
Oct 23 - Nov 21
Nov 22 - Dec 21
Dec 22 - Jan 19
Jan 20 - Feb 17
Feb 18 - Mar 19