After spending the whole of October in bed, you will greet the world with a renewed vigor.

Embrace new challenges and be helpful at work to those you have been awkward to in the past. Try to think up some new jokes and smile for at least 1 hour a day. Wink to at least three colleagues whilst using the urinal.

You will be dragged to the movies to watch a film you have no interest in whatsoever on 26th. Drink heavily for an hour before going, and throw insults at the screen when you feel it is appropriate. Go to pick a fight with the projectionist, he will prove impressively wriggly when you wrestle him.