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Video Of The Day (from the top 100s)

Horoscopes, September 2014

Philosophy: Beware the floating bubble of the angry fish, especially if you haven't seen where the bubble has come from... [More]

A truffle sniffing French pig will make itself known to you this month using the medium of mud on the carpet. [More]

A person wearing black socks will provide comfort in a moment of watery anxiety. [More]

Moist face towels will be in short supply around the 17th due to reasons that will become apparent on the 12th. [More]

Check that the electricity company hasn't wired up a street light to your house supply by switching off your supply and watching whether street lights go on or off at least twice this month. (Remember that they might have wired up a street light not in immediate sight of your house.)[More]

This month you will be entertained by a 'murder most foul' classic crime mystery. This will take the form of, either, a dinner murder mystery weekend, a compulsive television drama, or a dead body found under your stairs. [More]

Hallucinogenic drugs and smoked fish are this month's surprising bed fellows. [More]

Leftovers from a chicken meal will cause one of the most bizarre arguments in your life this month, and may only be resolvable using professional arbitrators. [More]

Your boating based contingency plans will go awry spectacularly on the 15th. [More]

A rare Jupertian undercurrent signifies a creative month for all Scorpios who enjoy the arts, literature and fast food in all of its forms. [More]

You will be drawn into a physically stressful argument over a small mammal with a child or young teen around the 9th. Ensure a supply of fruit is on hand to console any small mammal which may overhear your hurtful, mammalist, prejudices. [More]

A new baby, or a wild animal that likes nothing better than to scream at the top of its high, screechy, range, is about to enter your life in the most unexpected of ways. Stock up on baby food and dried animal pellets, always favoring products with banana or papaya in them. [More]

Video Of The Day - We Have Our Say: 2 Year Old Ice Bucket Challenge

Angry Man
Jessie Krufts, Interior Decorator

""I love the way that she blames the chair." [More]

Video Of The Day - Our Say: GoPro: That Oh S*** Moment

Angry Man
Jimmy Piper, Cartoon Aficionado

"Had he kept biking and the mother bear jumped on behind it would have been like a scene from the Hair Bear Bunch... 1970s Cartoon Kudos." [More]

Hair Bear Bunch

Video Of The Day - Our Say: Magician Tries To Sell Pot To A Cop!

Angry Man
Jessie Krufts, Magician's Magician

"I would have magic-ed it into the officer's top pocket and then citizen arrested his ass." [More]

Video Of The Day - Top This Video: Ice Bucket Challenge - Tom Cruise

Angry Man
Fred Flunkee, Dog Scraper

"What? No Ice Bucket?" [More]

Video Of The Day - We Have Our Say - Ice Bucket Challenge Again (Spoof)

Concerned Citizen
Jessie Krufts, Steam Engine Enthusiast

"Hmmm. It's not quite a faily fail is it?" [More]

Video Of The Day - We Have Our Say - Ice Bucket Challenge (Spoof)

Angry Man
Fred Flunkee, Dog Scraper

"I nominate a polar bear, a lion and an Elvis impersonator." [More]

Video Of The Day - We Have Our Say - Cool Man Wins $15.3mn In Poker Game

Angry Man
Jessie Krufts, Doctor

"I would have screamed." [More]

Video Of The Day - We Have Our Say - Selfie Everyday For 7 Years

Concerned Citizen
Jessie Krufts, Mork Impersonator

"Woosh. That's how I felt when I heard Robin Williams had died this morning." [More]

Video Of The Day - We Have Our Say - Kama The Surfing Pig

Concerned Citizen
Harry Zonderblurb, Leg Counterer

"Yea, but it's much easier surfing if you've got four legs and can use your nose as a fifth leg if needs be." [More]

Video Of The Day - We Have Our Say - Everything Wrong In Twister

Concerned Citizen
Jimmy Piper, Cartoon Aficionado

"This must be the most dramatic signing of divorce papers in movie history." [More]

Video Of The Day - We Have Our Say - Usain Bolt Dances To The Proclaimers

Angry Man
Jessie Krufts, Proclaimers Shirt Wearer

"It would have been funnier had he worn enormous eye glasses."[More]

Video Of The Day - We Have Our Say - San Diego ComicCon - Cosplay Music Video

Concerned Citizen
Jessie Krufts, Movie Financier

"Brilliant. An expensive looking video with the costume owners paying for their own costumes. I hope this is the dawning of a new age of low cost big budget movie making." [ More]

Video Of The Day - We Have Our Say - Cooking With Sista Girl

Concerned Citizen
Fred Flunkee, Dog Scraper

"In my version I use broken up cookies and cheese. Yummy." [More]

Horoscopes, August 2014

Aquarius

Foam and bicycles are well starred this month, as is in-flight catering (but not air travel itself which is badly starred). [More]

Aries

An increasingly fashion conscious Neptune will affect, favorably, your attitude towards puffy-out pantaloons and cravats after the 4th. [More]

Cancer

Avoid bare footed cart wheels and hoola-hooping on the second Sunday of the month. [More]

Capricorn

A pan-fried meal of chicken and, the charts suggest, something green, on the 7th, is set to dominate dinner based conversation for all the wrong reasons well into the end-of-year holiday season. (Ensure that you practice your vegetable-flipping wrist technique for at least three days before hosting any exotic vegetable flipping party.) [More]

Gemini

Animals wearing imitation berry fruits around their collars look set to help you start this month off in a pleasantly uncomplicated way.[More]

Leo

The stars suggest an avoidance of Egypt in all of its forms this month, especially Fez's, those 'smoky bubbly-pipes' and hot tea in glasses which burn your fingers because the glasses are so tiny and so full of hot steaming liquid... [More]

Libra

Patience towards a small fish will reap dividends this month in cute ways involving bubbles. [More]

Pisces

Lunar tidal exertions will hamper any attempts at a relaxing bath around the 3rd. [More]

Sagittarius

Your night time sleeping pattern is set to be disrupted for interstellar, cosmic, reasons over the coming weeks (260 weeks, that's 5 years) and is nothing to do with the incessant snoring of your partner or pet who sleeps in your bed. [More]

Scorpio

Cute Koala Bears will brighten your life this month, either the live, stuffed, or cartoon variety. Ensure that you take a bottle of milk with you in any journey over 6 miles. [More]

Taurus

Your attempt to playfully throw a stick so that a dog will run to catch it, is set to flummox the mutt around the 16th, especially if you also shout "Weeeeeeee!" [More]

Virgo

Avoid tongue twisters on the 18th - Jupiter is climaxing in its astro plain. [More]